Saturday, January 28, 2012

Muddlin' at the Crate and Barrel

Today LT and I were wandering around the ol' Crate and Barrel, seeing how the other half lives.

Basically, I was going from artfully decorated section to even more artfully decorated section like this: OOOOHHHH  LOOK AT THIS!!  LOOK AT THIS!!!

Then I saw it!!!
                                                              A SILICONE MUDDLER!!!!

          I didn't EVEN know I needed one!

And then Larry told me "We don't need this.  You don't even know how to muddle."

Hmmmnnn.  I may not know how to use a muddler, but I am WILLING TO LEARN!!!

But Larry held fast to his resolve and we left shortly afterwards, muddler-less.  The whining was starting to get to us.

Larry hates it when I whine....

Electronic Family

The art of communication has changed considerably since LT and I married.  Back then, if you missed a phone call, well, you didn't know it.  So when you said But I called you! people (i.e. your parents..) had to believe you.  My kids don't have it that easy!

Take last Wednesday for example - here's how we kept in touch:

By IM-ing:
Mary:
Lance and I are going to take dance lessons!
Me:
That's cool!
Mary:
Yeah, we figure we need to be able to dance at the wedding.
Me:
Are you going to learn how to do the Thriller dance?  You should do that for the wedding!
Mary:
Uh NO!
Me:
I guess it WOULD be hard to get that many zombies together on such short notice...
Mary:
That's right mom.

By Email:
Larry (mass emailing the entire family): 
Subject: Dad's Tool Bag of the Future
 http://www.amazon.com/Stanley-Consumer-Storage-518150M-18-inch/dp/B000Q5PHGQ/ref=cm_cr_pr_sims_t
FYI,
I am putting this on my wish list for birthday, father's day, etc.
Note this has a "shoulder strap"......thus making it a real man's European s houlder bag.....very popular with the "middle-age-man" Parisienne jet setters who want to go around tightening everything up.
Love,
Dad

Mary:
Subject: Re: Dad's Tool Bag of the Future
You only want this because Spence has one and he won't let you play with it.
Me:
Subject: Re: Dad's Tool Bag of the Future
Hahahaha!!  ENVY!!  That's how we got a Keurig and they got Mikey!!
Audrey:
Subject: Re: Dad's Tool Bag of the Future
Through some bizzare blackmarket?
Me:
Subject: Re: Dad's Tool Bag of the Future
1) We saw their Kuerig and died of envy. (We RAN OUT to get one) 
 2) The day I had Mary, Sue (the mother of two boys) called Spence from the hospital and said it's girl season!!  (Unfortunately, 91/2 months later it was NOT girl season in North Carolina where they moved shortly before Mikey was born...)

And by Texting:
Audrey:
Lord help me, I'm on a pms fueled trip to Target
Me:Dad says to get some windshield washer fluid.
Audrey:
How... How'd he know I was out?
Me:
He's Dad.

And there you go!!

And by the way, I TOTALLY think that the Thriller dance NEEDS to be danced at Mary's wedding!!

Who's with me??




Friday, January 27, 2012

This is a GREAT Salad!

 So today I spent much of the day at work in my car driving.  I went to Fairfax, I went to three places in Manassas, I hit the Post office in Catharpin!

When I got back to the office, my boss Laura invited me to have lunch upstairs while she put together a salad for her face party that night.
             OMG this salad is great!!  You must make this as soon as you can!!

Broccoli, Grape, and Pasta Salad

1 cup chopped pecans
1/2 (16-oz.) package farfalle (bow-tie) pasta
1 pound fresh broccoli
1 cup mayonnaise
1/3 cup sugar
1/3 cup diced red onion
1/3 cup red wine vinegar
1 teaspoon salt
2 cups seedless red grapes, halved
8 cooked bacon slices, crumbled
Preparation
1. Preheat oven to 350°. Bake pecans in a single layer in a shallow pan 5 to 7 minutes or until lightly toasted and fragrant, stirring halfway through.
2. Prepare pasta according to package directions.
3. Meanwhile, cut broccoli florets from stems, and separate florets into small pieces using tip of a paring knife. Peel away tough outer layer of stems, and finely chop stems.
4. Whisk together mayonnaise and next 4 ingredients in a large bowl; add broccoli, hot cooked pasta, and grapes, and stir to coat. Cover and chill 3 hours. Stir bacon and pecans into salad just before serving.
(From Southern Living Sept 2011)

I spent a couple of hours doing paperwork, then I got back in my car and picked up Jett, dropped him off, then drove to Dulles to pick up Jerry (Laura's husband) - during rush hour - dropped Jerry off, went home, jumped back in my car 15 minutes later and went to Laura's face party. 

It was a great day at the office!!!!

But seriously - MAKE THIS SALAD!!!!

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Old People TV

Shayne called and asked Larry what he was doing.  Larry said "Watching The Secret War."  "What's that?"  Shayne wanted to know,   "It's on the Military Channel."  "Oh," Shayne said.  "Old people TV."

OLD PEOPLE TV????

Hey, we're hip.  We know how to DVR stuff.  We watch Beavis and Butthead!  (And the Civil War Journal.)  We watch Archer and Dexter!  (And the Three Stooges.)  We watch Modern Family and Chopped!  (And I rarely watch Walker Texas Ranger anymore.)  I personally Keep up with the Kardashians - and only judge a little - and Teen Mom 2 - well, I judge a bit more, I mean WHAT are they doing with their lives??

But then, we don't watch American Idol.  Or the Amazing Race.  Or the Bachelor.  But we are aware of them and can be polite and watch them with you if we are inadvertantly there when they are on.

We are hip to the preschool shows.  We know what a mouse-ka-tool is.  We can talk Max and Ruby and sing the Fresh Beat songs and hum along with Olivia.  (O - LI - VI - AAAA...)

We watch Project Runway and dream of being related to Tim Gunn. 
                           

                                              Uncle Tim...Has certain ring to it!!!!

Old people TV? 

I don't think so.  We are eclectic and well, sophisticated in our choices, that's all.

I just really wish that I wasn't watching the P. Allen Smith Garden Show when Shayne dropped by later that day....

Monday, January 23, 2012

Menopause

I am sitting here crying my way thru Grey's Anatomy.  You know the one - it's the one where Callie is in the wreck and they are singing all thru it.  The songs they chose 'Chasing Cars', 'How to Save a Life', 'Just Breathe', all get to me anyway, and it certainly doesn't help that this is the episode that they aired 2 nights before Audrey fled the nest and moved to North Carolina.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NMVFmRiPifY

And also today I have been cold then unbearably hot and I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!!

Forget what they say in the Bible about childbirth.  The REAL punishment for eating that apple is MENOPAUSE !!!!

Yeah you deliver children writhing in pain - but only if you didn't get an epidural.  And then the pain ends. 

At this point in my life, I am pretty sure that menopause will never end.  That I will spend the next 10 years like I've spent the last 10 years - a hot-flashing hormonal mess.

No wonder they all moved out!!

Saturday, January 21, 2012

How to Make a Quick Cake


Ok, say it is your older daughter's birthday. 
And say that you get a little nervous about creating a cake for said daughter because she is a professional baker. 
Aaanndd then say that you and your younger daughter and your grandbabies run out just real fast to hit a thrift shop then go crazy and go all the way to IKEA.....

It is now 6pm and the family is coming over at 7pm for the white cake with pink icing that your daughter requested and that you promised you'd make.
It is not time to panic.

It is time to work SMARTER, not HARDER!

Step # 1:  Give your credit card to your younger daughter.

Step # 2:  Have her go to Wegmans (or any reputable grocery with a bakery).

Step # 3:  Have her purchase a frosted white cake and two tubs of pink frosting,  (No way you could get lucky enough to find a pink frosted white cake...).

Step # 4:  Put the purchased frosted cake on a cake stand, then carefully and thickly frost the cake with the pink frosting.

Step # 5:  Let your hard working younger daughter decorate the cake while you throw away all the store packaging.

Step # 6:  Sit back and enjoy the compliments!

Vow to yourself to do better next year!!

Sing-a-long with the Grandbabies

Our son Shayne should have been a comedian.  He can replicate any voice, any accent, any attitude and take us from giggling to helpless laughter.  (His impersonation of Brad, the girls former horse trainer was epic.  Esp when he moonwalked whilst talking like Brad, ending every statement with a HeeHEE ala Michael Jackson.  Well, you had to be there.)  But his real forte is changing the words to songs.  "How can we be lovers if I can't stand your face?"  is my favorite. And we can't forget when he sang along with the lepers from Jesus Christ Superstar...in Elmo's voice...I am not going to mention the words...this is after all a family post...

                                                   (Shayne and Audrey at Wolf Trap)

I always sing to the grandbabies.  It started with Grey.  He wasn't a cuddly lap baby - he was always busy doing stuff.  HOWEVER, if I plopped him on my lap and sang songs with him he'd stay.  It was also helpful for the long times we'd be stuck in traffic.  Neve on the other hand was the definition of cuddly lap baby and loved to be sung to. 

One day when Neve was about six months old and Grey was a little over three years we were stuck in traffic.  I mean stand still traffic.  And what was worse, Neve's diaper was uncomfortably full and she was inconsolable.  My best songs weren't helping.  Then we launched into Max and Ruby's breakfast song - "Start your day the healthy way, eggs Eggs EGGS!!!"  Nothing.  Then the father took over the son and Grey started singing "Start your day the healthy way blah Blah BLAH!!" and Neve stopped crying.  He sang it again and she started smiling.  By the time he'd sung it about 6 times she was laughing!

It was a traffic miracle!

So last night we were all in the car heading to dinner when Neve started singing about the Johnson's baby.  It is a song I learned when I was 5 and living in Mississippi and goes like this:

      The Johnsons had a baby, they named Tiny Tears.
      They put it in the bathtub to learn it how to float
      It drank all the water, ate all the soap,
      And now the Johnson's baby has bubbles in its throat!! 

We sang it about four times then five year old Grey said HE'D sing it for Neve...

(and I can't beleive that I was surprised...)

      The Johnsons had a baby, they named Tiny Tears.  
      They put it in the bathtub to learn it how to float
      It drank all the water, ate all the soup,
      And now the Johnson's baby has bubbles in its p - - -  

well, as I said, this is a family post...

Neve laughed hysterically...

Monday, January 16, 2012

Meet the Players

My husband Larry and I met 33 years ago in Lexington, KY where I was a divorced single mother and he was a senior at the University of KY.  We were both working at McDonalds - He was the night manager and I was the dayshift manager.  It was pretty much love at second sight and we've been together ever since. 

Larry (or LT), adopted Shayne, my son from my first marriage, we adopted Joshua and after being told I wasn't going to get pregnant, we had Mary 10 months later.  Two years later an Army doctor told me the same thing and we welcomed Audrey about 9 1/2 months after that.

  (We finally figured out how babies are made - Dr's telling us we weren't going to have babies...) 

Larry joined the Army, we moved around a lot and then he retired and we moved to VA to be close to our good friends Sue and Spence.  Larry is a consultant at a think tank near DC, I am an office manager at a small company.  Shayne lives in Manassas and is married to Jess and they have a 5 year old son named Grey and a 21/2 yr old daughter named Neve.  Joshua lives in Maryland and is separated from his wife.  Mary resids in Fairfax with her fiancee Lance and baby Audrey lives with her sweetie Addie in North Carolina. 

You'll notice that they don't live with us.  That was hard to take, and sometimes I feel I've been walking around in suspended animation since Audrey moved last year.

But now it is time to WAKE UP!! 

Get some stuff done!! 

Start cooking again!! 
(Restaurants are soooo nice!!) 

Time to shape up and clear out the cobwebs and get to know my hubby again!!

We'll see how it goes!!!

Saturday, January 14, 2012